30 Something

All last week I was battling in my mind, emotions, and spirit. My heart was so heavy. I was burdened and tormented by old stuff. You know when you do something wrong and hurt somebody...at the time, you don't think anything about it. You many even ask for forgiveness not realizing that damage done. But down the line, when you come to yourself, you realize how much harm was done because of your actions. Yeah, that's what I was battling last week. I've done some damage in my past and I thought I had forgiven myself because I prayed to God and repented, but for some reason, the enemy was trying to hold me hostage--keep my tied to what I did. The Bible says that "old things are past away..." But I couldn't get my mind and heart to line up and be in agreement that I asked for forgiveness so I needed to believe that I was forgiven. So I battled and was burdened by guilt and shame. Shame has me in an invisible prison. A prison where I didn't want to fellowship with my fellow sisters and brothers in Christ. I would continue to go to Christ with the same stuff over and over again as if I hadn't even asked Him to forgive me. It wasn't new stuff, it was stuff from long time again that God said, "as far as the east is from the west, I have removed your sin..." but I kept bringing it up to God like it was new. So, today, when I went up for prayer I asked God to free me of my shame. I'm not living in sin no more, but I felt like I was still guilty. But today I laid it all out to Jesus. I got my freedom. I feel so much lighter. I see myself different. That battle is not there anymore!!! THANK GOD!!!

This entry was posted on Sunday, January 16, 2011 at 3:17 PM. You can skip to the end and leave a response.