30 Something

This past week was our homecoming. GRRRRRRRRRR. I couldn't understand why so many teachers had such apahty about homecoming. I remember homecoming to be a fun time. Of course my only account to a high school homecoming was my time in high school, but how bad can it be? Well after Friday I was about to pull my hair out. I was so frustrated that I wanted to cry and I"m not a crier. The week started off okay. We had the usual bad hair day, costume day, dynamic duo day and we ended the week with class color day that concluded with an all school assembly which I didn't attend because I don't have a homeroom. I didn't mind not attending either because by noon I was at my wits end with my students. Luckily I took heed to what teachers were saying and didn't plan to much activity for the week. We watched Akeelah and the Bee because we are in the chapter that talks about mental health and how self esteem effects mental health. However, despite that I still had to have a coming to Jesus talk with 7th hour. One student had the audacity to tell me that I give way too much homework. Mind you this student has missed over half of the time in my class and is constantly in APR for misbehaving in other teacher's classes. So he had no right to talk about the work that I give him. I did tell them that I wasn't going to take their disrespect anymore at all. I put three students out and I scared a few more. I think I'm gonna have that talk with 6th hour too. My problem is that I don't follow through. I give them chance after chance and I say that I"m gonna give them a detention and then they apologize and bam it's right back to the same behavior. It frustrates me so much. Then I have the students that don't care if I give them a detention because they don't show up at all. It stesses me out. Why can't they make students that way that they used to: nice, mannerable, wouldn't think twice about talking back to the teacher or having an attitude with the teacher. I've been so stressed out that it is affecting my immune system. I've had upper respiratory problems since the beginning of September. I take a constant dose of Zicam and airborne at least once a week. I started back taking one a day vitamins because i'm not eating like I should. I know that's no way to lose weight, but I simply don't feel like eating, even when i'm hungry. I have to make myself eat. I haven't been stressed like this in a while. But, it's a different kind of stress. When I was working at the college, it was more like a dread to go to work, now it's stress where I'm trying my best to do evertying right and it's still not working. My goal is to teach long enough to take my admin certification test and to move on. I don't want to be a teacher forever. I want to be an administrator or a counselor. I think I want to go back to school to get my counseling cert because the classroom is not for me at all. I can't deal with the attitudes and the disrespect, I hate grading papers, and I hate calling parents with bad news that their children come from satan and are destined to ruin my life. I hate having to deal with students that don't care whether they pass or fail. That just drives me crazy and I hate being evaluated. We have such a strict evaluation. If I'm not excellent then I will not be hired back. So there's the stess of managing my class and working on being excellent. There's no leaveway. Ugh.

In other news, I started to date Terry, but that's going down the tubes because he told me the other day that he's been seeing his ex-gf, so me and Nate dog have been kicking it for the past week. I really really like him. I can't get him off my mind. I haven't been so enthralled with anyone like this in a while. I count down the hours until he's home from work. It's sickening. A couple of days ago he was trying to get hot and heavy and I kept pushing him away, one because I have a nasty cold sore and two because I did't want him to get the wrong impression, but the entire time he was grabbing on me he was telling me that he wanted to fall in love with me and that he thought I was the one as soon as he met me in July. The only bad thing was that he was telling me all of this while he was a little tipsy. I told him the other day that I don't believe anything anyone tells me while drunk or while having sex. People are liable to promise me the world during those times. So he did tell me that even though he was buzzed he meant every word he said. My heart started to beat really fast. I can't wait to see him this eveing. I think I'm gonna cook dinner for him.

In other news I absolutely hate my neighborhood. I love my apartment, but I hate the fact that there are crackheads that will do anything to steal. I left my phone, purse, wallet, and $20 in my truck and went to get something. Instead of coming right back down I decided that I wanted to watch Judge Judy and sit for a minute. That minute turned into an hour and when I finally went down to get my stuff out of the car I found a little piece of metal sticking out of my car door. I don't do too well under pressure so at first I was thinking that the neighborhood kids were playing around. Went I did get my stuff--my purse, my wallet and the $20, I didin't think anything about it until I realized that my phone was gone. I acted the little boy around if he had seen anyone messing with my truck and he said that when he was coming outside he saw a man at my truck and he yelled at him and the man grabbed something and left. Ugh. He stole my cell phone, but he didn't have a chance to get anything else. Grrrrrr. Now I remember why I never park in the back anymore and I'll never do it again. I'm also thinking about buying an alarm system for my truck.

This entry was posted on Sunday, October 08, 2006 at 1:30 PM. You can skip to the end and leave a response.