30 Something

So Troy and I decided to take ourselves out of the market. But for some reason I have this urge to cheat. I don't feel like I"m in a relationship. I don't see him very often because our work schedules conflict. I work during the day and he works during the evening. So I still feel like I can go out on dates. I haven't even changed my yahoo and myspace status to "in a relationship" yet. Plus, I can't tell if the sex is good or not. We've only been together twice and the first time was okay, but the second time wasn't good at all. He actually fell asleep. WTF? The first time btw was after me and *&^%%&* got together, so I really don't count that time. I was already wound up. I dont know. I'm trying to stay positive, but I'm not sure how long I can hold on.

Mister and I made a date to see each other. I know it was a bad move, but if Troy doesn't step up then I'm gonna have to move on. I think I'm gonna tell Mister that I don't want to see him because it will only lead to a pretty nice romp. B said that he wanted to see me. He left me a text that was pretty suggestive. I don't know if I want to go there with him. I like us a friends. He is a wonderful kisser, but i like him only as a friend.

School has been good. I'm counting down until summer. I need a summer job fast so that I won't be totally broke.

I was at the library with my sis and a really cute guy donned in a really nice suit walked in. He excited me and I was eyeing him a little bit and he was eyeing me. I told my sis that he was cute and she agreed and urged me to speak to him, but of course I wasn't going there. I never approach a guy. As we were leaving I noticed him walking towards and and I was about to speak when he passed by me and went to my sis. My face hit the floor. My sis was a little floored too because she wasn't paying any attention to him. She found that that he was only 23, but dag, I can't believe that I got passed over for my sister. Man, was a embarrassed.

I was so excited a week ago when I went to our b-ball game in Springfield. We won, 47-44 and we were state bound. All we needed to do was win supersectionals against O'fallon on that Tuesday. Well, I didn't go to the game because it was a 3-hour drive on a school night, but I heard it was a very good game. People were sitting on the edge of their seats throughout the entire game. We lost 60-63. I was so sad when I watched the news. It reminded me of being in high school again. I'm still proud of our b-ball team though.

In other news. Terrance broke up with me. The funny thing is that we weren't together. Yes, we've been together, but we were considered friends. He said that since he loved me and I didn't feel the same way about him, he needed some time away from me. On the flip side I met someone new--T-roy. He's Tonya's brother. I'm really digging him, but he has a few quirks that I don't like, ie. wearing his hat at dinner, wearing shades at nine at night in the house. Boy, hip hop culture really gets to people, ugh. I want to tell him sometimes to grow the fuck up. But oh well. Mister and I rekindled and old flame last night. He told me that he broke up with his gf, so i assume that he was lonely. I wasn't planning on spending any time with him, but since he paid $200 for me a new phone I figured I owed him a little bit of my time. I ended up spending the night. I just can't tell him no.