Other Peoples Baggage
If you are in a relationship where you love the person you are with, and only has eyes for that person, but that person continues to fabricate stories of why he/she can't trust you... you, my dear, are dealing with someone else's baggage. I remember when me and Mister was going on vacation to Chicago. Our trip was cut short because he got mad at me for leaving to go the car before him. Yes, that's why he got mad. It turned into an ugly night for the both of us and we ended up cutting our trip short. After about a week of not talking to him he confessed that he had been out of town with a woman that he dated and she left with no way to get home. WHAT??? Why would I do that to someone? I wouldn't want anyone to do that to me.
In relationships, there are times when a person has endured something that caused pain and distress. When a similar situation occurs, the distress comes up again and causes more pain. The problem comes when the situation is innocent. It kind of puts me in the mind of post traumatic stress symdome. You know how a war veteran gets flashbacks and ducks for cover when they hear a car backfire. Yeah, that's what it's like. A totally innocent situation has now become a big issue.
For a long time I didn't want to get married. I didn't think that I could because I was carrying around years and years of old stuff and I didn't want to damage the relationship. Sure enough, when I was with a man that did want to marry me, I causes hurt because of the baggage I was carrying. However, now I'm free of that and don't want to be in a relationship with a person who is carrying old stuff around and will experience PTSD if were are in a specific situation. I've let go of my baggage, so I don't want to deal with anyone else's. I guess that's why I couldn't really get with Coach. He was holding on to too much stuff. Never mind that fact that he was still interested in his ex, but his baggage was way older than that.
I've got a friend who is in a similar situation. He wants to marry this girl, but she keeps making up stuff to sabotage the relationship. I told him that I understood where she was and that it would not get better until she decided to let that old stuff go because she was accusing him of things that he was not doing. Just let it go, I wanted to tell her. This man loves her dirty drawers, but she can't see that because she's carrying so much hurt. She can't marry him because of all those bags and I really I don't want him to marry her if he's gonna have to deal with that (I didn't tell him that though.) Because it won't be good. Hurting people hurt other people and I don't want to see my friend hurt.
In relationships, there are times when a person has endured something that caused pain and distress. When a similar situation occurs, the distress comes up again and causes more pain. The problem comes when the situation is innocent. It kind of puts me in the mind of post traumatic stress symdome. You know how a war veteran gets flashbacks and ducks for cover when they hear a car backfire. Yeah, that's what it's like. A totally innocent situation has now become a big issue.
For a long time I didn't want to get married. I didn't think that I could because I was carrying around years and years of old stuff and I didn't want to damage the relationship. Sure enough, when I was with a man that did want to marry me, I causes hurt because of the baggage I was carrying. However, now I'm free of that and don't want to be in a relationship with a person who is carrying old stuff around and will experience PTSD if were are in a specific situation. I've let go of my baggage, so I don't want to deal with anyone else's. I guess that's why I couldn't really get with Coach. He was holding on to too much stuff. Never mind that fact that he was still interested in his ex, but his baggage was way older than that.
I've got a friend who is in a similar situation. He wants to marry this girl, but she keeps making up stuff to sabotage the relationship. I told him that I understood where she was and that it would not get better until she decided to let that old stuff go because she was accusing him of things that he was not doing. Just let it go, I wanted to tell her. This man loves her dirty drawers, but she can't see that because she's carrying so much hurt. She can't marry him because of all those bags and I really I don't want him to marry her if he's gonna have to deal with that (I didn't tell him that though.) Because it won't be good. Hurting people hurt other people and I don't want to see my friend hurt.
This entry was posted
on Monday, January 17, 2011 at 7:39 AM.
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